Love is in little things…
Love is in a silent gaze, in a touch, in Care…
Love is in everyday life.
Love is in the Will to be part of your life, even if for only five minutes!
Love is in the Will to be in contact with you, even on the phone.
Love is in that free and unconditional Flow.
The idea that Love has to be demonstrated through gifts, special and unique experiences or great acts that snatch us away is an illusion!
A Relationship is not just about doing things and having things!
A Relationship is much more Being, than having or doing!
A Relationship is allowing yourself to be!
And what is that: to allow yourself to be?
To allow yourself to be demands Corage, Faith and Confidence.
To allow yourself to be is to accept the frequency you are in, is to communicate in the frequency in which you are able to communicate, is to live the obstacles that arise on your Path, is to walk the Path of Evolution alongside someone else, with someone else. To allow yourself to be is to not be afraid to Be who You are!
If you have different beliefs from someone else, there’s a path you have to take between your beliefs and those of the other person. Path to Understanding… a path that allows you to broaden the space in which you both relate within who you both are!
It is not the opposite! It is not going out of your beliefs to find yourself in a neutral space where you have to hide who you are to be okay with someone else that hides who they are too. That way you are not being! You are just doing things together and having experiences and things together. You’re just playing each one’s part in a surreal relationship.
And that turns out to be an obstacle to Happiness!
In Love people are not supposed to stop being who they are in order to be able to live with someone who will also stop being who they are. In a Relationship there are two Selves who come together and create a new Being, being Us. But for this new Being to exist, the two Selves must exist as well. In other words, the two I’s create together a greater scope of what they can live together.
And this is built together. It’s not everyone in one’s corner. It’s not everyone waiting for things to change and make the relationship easier. How often do people stop themselves from having a relationship because they still have to finish something or because they still don’t have financial stability, or just because something else?
Let’s be honest: they are not in a relationship with someone they love because they are living out of fear!
Let’s be honest once again: there is always something to improve or modify; there are always edges that have to be cleared up. This is part of Evolution as a Being and as a Couple.
Anyway, it’s wonderful to be with someone once in a while, go out to dinner or a movie, have some nice conversations and hang out, and in the end, everyone goes home. I usually call this Illusion, because life makes a stop there, we’re with that person out of our life for a dream date and then we go back to normal life.
When people start living together, spending 24 hours a day, living each other’s problems together, we become aware of what the real relationship is.
And this illusion of wonder, of hovering when we are together, happens only because we are not dealing with our problems, because we alienate ourselves from them to experience only a light and fluid moment, full of roses!
We all have our “stuff” and, when we decide to live with someone, we have to deal with these “stuff”, so there are moments that we do not feel this Lightness, this Peace, this Flow. Just like in our lives, when we’re alone.
In the first phases of a Relationship, in which there is not yet a true Relationship, there are only dates, some more frequent and others less frequent. These dates allow us to disconnect a little bit from the life we have, from our problems, from our fears, from our blockages, from our doubts!
Maybe that’s why there are so many people who can’t live deeper connections, they are hooked on those superficial dates.
When they decide to take a step forward and live together, things get complicated, because that person is used to disconnecting from their life, instead of preparing to face and accept what life gives…
Accept what life gives and still be happy, still have a healthy relationship, still walk forward, even having its obstacles, fears, doubts, worse moments or anger – all this is part of life.
Life is not a straight line!
Life has its ups and downs.
And if we don’t learn to be with someone in those ups and downs, accepting that there are times when we – the two I’s – are lower frequency, less patient or high frequency and cheerful, there’s nothing to do – that’s not a relationship!
To love is to care!
Love is not disconnection!
To love is to be free, yes! It is not to imprison others.
To love is to care…
Love is to take care for someone through Freedom…
Love is to give space to the other person to have their moments and, mainly, realize that we are not “guilty” or responsible for the attitudes of others, whether good or bad.
The other person’s attitudes, behaviors, words, feelings are related to what he or she is experiencing at that moment.
Why does a person who has always accepted us as we are begins to question everything we do, say, feel, are? Is it related to us?
No!
It is related to he or she and what he or she is living.
And if we’re in a relationship with that person, we’re expected to take care of them at that moment.
Caring is often letting you have those moments, letting you live what you’re feeling, letting you realize for yourself that there are some things in life that are not pleasing and that provoke emotional outbursts.
Does it makes sense?
